P1 Oklahoma State

AMAZING

2009-04-27T12:27:00.000-07:00

CMI Love<3

2009-04-13T21:07:00.000-07:00

So, I'm very excited about the way the CMI is unfolding... I do have some favorites, to be sure.
I love the electronica sound of Brite Lite Brite... very soothing and thought-provoking and I appreciate that. Hopefully they travel down to the midwest so I can see them live, that'd be pretty tight... There aren't many bands in the CMI that are locally pertaining to my region, except The Features which are a few states away in Nashville, TN. Their rockish, new wave sound tends to me in the same realm as Ghostland Observatory and I kind of like it.
Internationally, Hogni, is my favorite on the project. They will most likely comprise the majority of the tracks on my summer lake mix this year :-) very chill. Sort of a John Butler Trio sound-a-like. Big applause there
Pinstripe 45's bring a pretty tune to the mix too. Their songs "Living In Times Like These" and "I Don't Know What Hit Me" sound like songs off a soap opera episode, One Tree Hill, perhaps.

Kudos everybody, lets finish out this semester strong.

-Ad

Summer Tour for Bon Iver Posted

2009-04-12T14:04:00.000-07:00

Indie Folk singer Justin Vernon is bringing his band Bon Iver back on international tour this summer. Originally from Wisconsin, most of his inspiration and musical investments come from nature and represents its simplicity and honest beauty. Bon Iver, pronounced Bohn eevair, is French for "good writer" and is spelled wrong on purpose :-)

His summer tour will include mostly northwestern USA and a few hits in the UK, germany, and netherlands. Most of his songs in his latest album "For Emma" are sung in his highly recognizable falsetto overtones. Look out for Iver this summer in these lucky venues:

May 15 2009 8:00P
ALL TOMORROW’S PARTIES MINEHEAD, SOMERSET, UK

May 18 2009 8:00P
BRIGHTON FESTIVAL BRIGHTON

May 19 2009 8:00P
ZAKK DUSSELDORF, GERMANY

May 20 2009 8:00P
übel&gefaehrlich HAMBURG, GERMANY

May 22 2009 8:00P
Sasquatch Music Festival Quincy, Washington

Jun 6 2009 8:00P
Workplay Birmingham, Alabama

Jun 7 2009 8:00P
Variety Playhouse w/ Elvis Perkins Atlanta, Georgia

Jun 9 2009 8:00P
Revolution w/ Elvis Perkins Ft. Lauderdale, Florida

Jun 10 2009 8:00P
The State Theater w/ Elvis Perkins St. Petersburg, Florida

Jun 12 2009 8:00P
BONNAROO FESTIVAL 2009 MANCHESTER, TN

Jun 13 2009 8:00P
BONNAROO FESTIVAL 2009 MANCHESTER, TN

Jun 14 2009 8:00P
BONNAROO FESTIVAL 2009 MANCHESTER, TN

Jul 7 2009 8:00P
Twilight Concert Series w/ Jenny Lewis Salt Lake City, Utah

Jul 11 2009 8:00P
Ogden Theatre Denver, Colorado

Jul 25 2009 8:00P
CAMP BESTIVAL DORSET, UK

Aug 12 2009 8:00P
OYA FESTIVAL 2009 OSLO, NORWAY

Aug 21 2009 8:00P
LOWLANDS NETHERLANDS

Aug 22 2009 8:00P
GREEN MAN FESTIVAL POWYS, UK

GET READY FOR THE SUMMER :-) GOD BLESS -AD

2009-03-30T09:12:00.001-07:00

Adley and the Glass from Quinten Cawthon on Vimeo.

SO THIS WAS TAKEN BY MY LOVELY FRIEND QUINTEN AT THE TO WRITE LOVE ON HER ARMS CONFERENCE. I HAVE ALWAYS WANTED TO MAKE CRYSTAL WHISTLE AND I FINALLY GOT IT. SLIGHTLY HUMILIATING!!!

WHERE THE WILD THINGS ARE

2009-03-29T20:52:00.000-07:00

Surprisingly, this movie's trailer intrigued me quite a bit. I didnt know how I would feel about this classic children's book (my favorite growing up) being made into a major motion picture. I thought it would ruin some of the mystery and novelty of the story. That trailer was catchy from the get-go. I really believe they might have done the book justice in making this film... the characters look so much like the ones from the book and I really see potential for it bringing the story alive and making it relative to children's lives and instincts and desires as they are growing up. There is a common thread that lies within all of us as the trailer points out. We all own love and fear within our lives and the trailer makes it seem like it exemplifies what that looks like, exactly. The music was actually my favorite part! At first I thought it was kind of a weird mood setter, but as it went on, the originality of it surprisingly kept me excited about the film and this one I actually might make it to the theaters for. I hope to see more of it! My favorite car chase theme song is "Black" by Sevendust.

My favorite opening movie credit song has to be the Austin Powers song where they are all dancing in the streets. for sure.
my favorite ending credits song is the one in the end of that Ashton Kutcher movie "The Guardian." The song is "Never Let Go" by bryan adams. Check it out. It'll change your life.
My favorite fight song, (well one of them) is in 3000 miles to Graceland. Its by Spineshank, "New Disease."
A pretty good love scene song is "Prophecy" by Remy Zero as used in The Last Kiss. Pretty tight, but I dont remember where but The Fray's "you found me." (LOVE THIS SONG) was used recently and was pretty awesome too! :-)

MUSIC IS POWER...DUH

2009-03-23T09:12:00.000-07:00

Oh how I wish I could go to Lollapalooza this year... the lineup looks pretty promising overall, but as for the headliners? not so much...

Beastie Boys? I think we can unanimously vote that we're over it...
Kings of Leon? OK, not bad.. they rock pretty hard.
Jane's Addiction? Bringing back the original headliner from the initial Lolla? Whatev...
I guess he started it all, he can do what he wants.
Depecha Mode? Really...

I'm glad Explosions in the Sky will be there though. Since Friday Night Lights, EITS has been number one on my list of thinking music. They don't even need words to promote massive quantities of emotion and reality. "Home" reminds me of that scene on American Beauty where the plastic bag is blowing in the wind symbolizing our lives... pretty righteous.

I'd rather have been able to make it to SXSW this year than Lolla believe it or not... thats what happens when the headliners are under par... sorry dudes. Bring Britney back :-)

DECEMBERISTS IN APRIL...

2009-03-05T17:05:00.000-08:00

WHAT A PLEASANT SURPRISE....

THE DECEMBERISTS OPENING UP THE SXSW show in Austin March 18th!

The 4 man 1 woman band from Portland is kicking off their '09 tour in Austin before heading off to ravish the rest of the nation with their lyrical novelty.

Decemberists host sold out concerts world-wide and never cease to remain at the top of the Indie charts. Under major record label Capitol Records they are prepared to release "The Hazards of Love," their new album set to launch March 24 of this year.

While "Engine Driver" is my all-time favorite, "Hazards of Love" from their new album presents a different sound than their usual and is sure to draw in a new crowd.

Perhaps my favorite characteristic of the Decemberists is that they write music like poetry. It is evident that their songwriter, Colin Maloy, is a fiction writer and is quite fond of the fluffy adjectives.

Be sure to look out for the Decemberists this month as well as the rest of '09 as they come to a city near you. :-)

THE ULTIMATE

2009-02-13T20:24:00.001-08:00

What a rough decision... four great genres... the best 3 tier lineup... and here are the qualifiers. I mixed it up a little bit and for my shows I am having each one represent a cause I know that the band has ties with and chooses to represent. Music is powerful and brave, and it has the power to change the world by changing perspectives. Even jazz... a lot of jazz doesn't include lyrics. But if it's right, you know exactly what the composer was feeling when he first played it.

In the Rock division (my personal favorite...)

OPENING THE SHOW: single file

THE MIDWAY: CUTE IS WHAT WE AIM FOR

THE BIG ONE: BOYS LIKE GIRLS!

<3>

Their philanthropic decision is with TAKEACTION! Takeaction! is at my make-believe tour with them. It is its eighth year running, and TA raises funds and public awareness for youth involvement in charitable action. DoSomething.org would be where their percentage of profits from donations, ticket sales, and merchandise would go to. :-)

IN MY JAZZ CATAGORY:

OPENING: RON COBB

SUSPENSING: CHRIS MCDONALD

HEADLINING: RHONDA MCCOY!

It just so happens that all of these jazz artists are under Christian label... So to be funny... Donald Miller will be a midway guest speaker at this concert (which is in a Jazz hall in Chi-town) and the first 100 people there will get a copy of his book "Blue Like Jazz." Miller, in the preface of his book, talks about spirituality being like jazz in a way.

"I never liked jazz music because jazz music doesn't resolve. But I was outside the Bagdad Theater in Portland one night when I saw a man playing the saxophone. I stood there for fifteen minutes, and he never opened his eyes. After that, I liked jazz. Sometimes you have to watch somebody love something before you can love it yourself. It is as if they are showing you the way..." Donald will speak at the event. It'd be tiiight.

IN THE HIP HOP DIVISION:

First up: DJ LAZ

Following: Pitbull

FINISHING: MISSY ELLIOT!!!!

SO I'm pumped about this one! Missy is the best selling female hip hop artist of all time with 5 multi platinum albums. she owns her own freakin' record label AND she is a national spokeswoman for "Break The Cycle," a non-prof org. dedicated to preventing domestic violence. Way to go, girl. Missy will speak out against the cause right before she plays "Ching-A-Ling." :-)

AND NOW FOR THE GENRE OF MY CHOICE: I like passionate music, and I am passionate about what God has done in and through my life and the power of it all, so I'm presenting an ideal line up for some crazy amazing artists from a Christian genre.

OPENING: BETWEEN THE TREES

FOLLOWING: SINCE OCTOBER

HEADLINING: FLYLEAF!!!!!

MAN, THESE BANDS GET ME GOING. FLYLEAF HITS SO HARD, THE SCREAMING AND THE BEAUTY OF THOSE POWERFUL LYRICS NEVER CEASE TO GIVE ME CHILLS.

THESE BANDS WILL REPRESENT "TO WRITE LOVE ON HER ARMS." THOUGH TWLOHA IS NOT NOTABLY A CHRISTIAN MOVEMENT, IT IS A MESSAGE EVERYONE NEEDS TO HEAR. TWLOHA IS MY FAVORITE CAUSE... IT BRINGS AWARENESS AND HOPE TO THOSE WHO SUFFER FROM DEPRESSION, SUICIDE, AND SELF-INJURY. IT IS A VERY HONEST THING, AND I'VE GOTTEN THE CHANCE TO WORK WITH THIS, AND IT HAS CHANGED ME SO MUCH THROUGH ITS MESSAGE. BTT WILL BE THE SPOKESPERSON FOR THIS EVENT.

SO THIS WAS MY ULTIMATE LINEUP... THIS SHOULD TOTALLY HAPPEN... EVEN THOUGH IT WAS JUST MAKE BELIEVE, ANY OF THESE CONCERTS COULD TOTALLY ROCK! :-) AM I RIGHT??

She Wants To Be Anya...

2009-01-26T10:01:00.001-08:00

Anya Marina's November '08 release of "Slow and Steady Seduction: Phase II" marks the beginning of my cravings for her melodic variety and quirky lyrics. "Move You" puts me away from the stresses of the day with repetitive guitar that serves me rest on a pillowed platter. Picking up mid-song with a hip back-beat, this song is pure rapture that is guaranteed to put child-like bliss in the smirk of any Indie-pop lover. There is not a single song on this album that keeps me less than entertained or fails to stake claim as a rockin' toe-tapper. Most of her songs keep a catchy beat and don't stray too far from her norm, which is generally common when all the songs come from the same song writer (herself).

She has voices dang near paralleled with Coco Rosie and Sia, pretty whiny, assertive and opinionated. Way to go, another genius album for Miss Marina.

Praise Be To Thee, Father

2009-01-21T13:19:00.000-08:00

As faux be the woe of a rich man’s folly
So too do weak men dapple
In idols that puddle, befuddle and wilt
As it be from a fallen apple.
And as the burning bush did belt
The name of its minion’s manor
The swell of a spell from the darkness’ bell
Did toll on my heart-lit lantern.
Why then, ye ‘frain from mending the wound
By thy own’s most despised betrayer.
I know not why thou
say thou loveth him still
as he fell from heaven’s lair.
For as I plead for aide from thy son,
His enemy doth riseth to par
And racks me o’er and o’er with blood
And laughs at my worship of scars.

Thy kingdom is one of paradoxical claims
And thy knowledge I ache to acquire
Why men should fall to lose their life
To then save themselves from fire?
And while thou enemy doth liveth to say
That his commands I can’t but heed,
I’ll say thee win when my heart doth then
begin to silently bleed.
I’m dead to thee
Son of evil’s womb
I’m fallen, but risen, indeed.

Blind To Circles

2008-11-17T11:48:00.001-08:00

Again, drag your fingers ‘cross my face, forgery

I hate it when you touch me.

Make me close my eyes

Bow to your name I can’t respect.

Turmoil tangles veins of knowledge, I have

Inconsistency to paralyze me.

You do not know me, shadow

No, ghost, you cannot lie

To shut my eyes

I believe in light and angels.

Take the halo from my rim

Fellow sinners

Replace it with broken mirrors, one for each of you.

Use me, abuse me, learn from

My transgressions

I know you see likeness in my

Silhouettes

You miss the point, follier

Blind to circles and redundancy

You pattern

Towers of lost butterflies.

Don’t you see, little man

Son of my mistake

I fell to it, but yet I’ve learned

So that you may know

Ignorance is bliss.

Accountable to knowledge

We become pencils.

So change this world

Because you’ve seen it.

It is yours.

Hug yourprostitutes

Fix yourburningbuildings.

Pray to the beckoning artist of it all

Born holier than kings

In a barn of dirt and rags

I see it now

To reassure everyone

“no one is too low for me.”

This is my open eye, angel.

The Last Yielded Hope

2008-10-29T12:13:00.000-07:00

“I don’t know what it's for anymore I'm not even sure If there is anyone Who is in the sun Can you help me to understand? Cause I've been caught in between All I wish for and all I need. Or maybe you're not even sure What it's for Any more than me.” Bryan rolled over. The lyrics are loud in his ears and thoughts of surrendering become his only friend. Staring at and trying to escape into the posters on his wall makes him feel infinite. He finds his tourniquet by finding music, and by becoming the people in the posters -- redeemed by their own lyrics. He remembers the quote of a wise man who once said, Stories ask for endings, but songs are brave things, bold enough to sing when all they know is darkness… This is his gospel. He hears his dad cooking dinner downstairs, obviously alone. It has just been he and his dad for a while now. That Heartless Beast drove his wife away. He was so cold, always so cold to her. Why was he that way? Why is anybody that way to someone they once swore their life to? Bryan pulled the sheets up over his head, moaned, swung his legs over the edge and forced himself up out of bed. Surrender can wait another day. It'll surely get better… Walking downstairs and into the kitchen, and removing his hands from his pockets, he grabbed a carrot from the serving platter and stood leaned over the counter, fingering a pen around on the marble, and avoiding eye contact with his father. “Hey B, nap well?” Dad advocated small talk as their primary mode of communication. “Fine,” Bryan mumbled. He grabbed his tattered hoodie and headed for the door. “Where are you going?” yelled the Martinet’s voice from the kitchen. The only reply he got was the understood hatred that came with the slamming of the front door. Bryan made his way to his uncle Jason’s house, unfortunately a relative on his dad’s side. “How could such a rotten guy have such a cool brother?'' he wonders. Uncle Jason is Bryan’s sanctuary, his confidant, and his one true friend. He tells him everything, even about how upset he is, and how much anger he has towards his dad. Jason is one of those people who understands, feels music, and relates to Bryan in every way that he desires. He doesn’t even seem to be bothered by the fact that Bryan hates his dad. Jason just reassures him that his brother really is a good guy and that people make mistakes. People make mistakes, but the way Bryan looks at it, his dad must have made some mistakes over, and over, and over again. Some people don’t deserve forgiveness. Bryan gets to Jason’s house and walks in the side door that opens to the laundry room. He walks through to the living room and spots the new Coldplay album on the coffee table. He picks it up and twiddles it between his fingers, glancing over front and back covers. He moves his unkempt, scraggly brown hair out of his eyes and glances up to see Jason in the doorway. “Heard their new stuff yet?” Jason asked. “Pretty legit. Speaks a bee-line to the soul.” “Nah, overrated.” Bryan sets it back. Jason chuckled with a smirk. “Have a seat. Show me the latest.” Jason dug through his raggedy jean-pocket and pulled out a torn out yellow sheet of paper from a legal pad. He held it uneasily for a bit and folded it a couple times over in his hand. His eyes peered over to Jason. “Give it here, man, seriously.” He tossed it over. Jason slowly unfolded it, careful not to rip the worn seams. You could tell the paper had been worked a few times over. Is it bad that I’ve become an expert at hiding tears, Because the pain is so deep, They can’t reach my eyes? Is it bad that I want to starve But not notice that I’m giving up Because that only means I am weak? Is it bad that sometimes I turn the heat all the way off Because the numbing seems to bring some sort of pleasure? Is it bad that my life seems to hit every red light So I question daily the person that I am. Or is it even worse that I’m starting not to care? Is it bad that I pray sometimes that I’m someone’s prayer? Because it seems like my prayers alone don’t work? Is it bad that sometimes I close my eyes for so long And I forget the painful fact that I’m still living? Is it bad that I wish I didn’t have feelings, Because the only ones I feel Make me cry? Is it bad that I ask God to plant me in a dream Because I feel like I have no reason To wake up in the morning? Everything is meaningless. He was quiet for a minute. Bryan could tell that he felt uneasy. “Damn, dude,” Jason finally sighed. “That’s deep stuff. You doin’ okay?” He looked worried. “Yeah, I’m fine.” Bryan brushed away his hair. “I write darker than I am, for real. “Why?” “The sad stuff just means more to people, you know? It’s like, people can connect to it. Anybody, no matter what they’ve been through or what they haven’t; everyone hurts somewhere. People live primarily out of their pain, and most of the time they don’t even realize it.” “Yeah, but…. Geez, I don’t know…you’re just a kid. Seventeen years old, man, you shouldn’t be thinking like this. Hell, I’m 34 and I’ve never thought a thing this depressing in my whole life.” Jason was rubbing his chin and leaning forward, intensity in his voice and concern in his eyes. “This poem doesn’t have a hint of hope in it. It speaks to people, you’re right, but offers no helping hand.” “If you can speak to people’s pain, you can change them,” Bryan replies. “No one ever got anywhere with anyone by talking about how amazing butterflies are. And besides, it’s just a poem, dude, chill. I gotta let out somewhere. Quit worryin’, I only show you this stuff cause I trust you to not wig out.” Bryan was regretting showing him this one. Jason had been reading Bryan’s work for a couple of years now. When your dream is to be a poet, you’ve got to have a critic. “I’m not wigging out, I just don’t want you to have your mind in places that think like this. It’s incredibly depressing. Do you really feel this way? How are things doing at home since we last talked about it? I’m sorry, bud, but when you show me a piece like this, I’m gonna dig a little bit.” Jason sat back. It had been a couple weeks since they’d discussed the Heartless Beast. “Same. He’s still a bastard. I mean, he’s still the same as always. You can’t forgive someone like him. In one year, I’ll be out. Just one more year. I’ll go to college in Pheonix, away from Houston, and close to mom. She needs me.” “Your mom is a strong woman, Bryan, she’s doing fine, I’m sure.” Jason is trying. “I’ve gotta make sure. When you’ve lived and been sucked into a life as bad as the one she must have had with him, you’re never healed I bet.” Bryan pushes. He will win this argument. “I disagree. So my brother treated her bad, it was over a year ago, she’s over it by now. Trust me.” Jason seemed confident enough. They hadn’t had a conversation like this in a few months. “Whatever,” Bryan muttered. “Let’s just get some dinner or somethin’.” They ate dinner and talked about philosophy, about battling religions and about life. They talked about Baghdad. Bryan feeds off of Jason’s wisdom. There is something about his uncle that is so appealing. There are no boundaries in this friendship. Jason tells Bryan when he thinks he is wrong or overreacting, and Bryan, even though he may not show it, always entertains Jason’s advice. They finish up with some coffee about midnight and Bryan hops in his beat-up Ford and heads back to the Dungeon. The Tyrant was reading in the red chair in the living room when Bryan walked through the door. “You know I hate it when you visit him,” His father looked up from his book. He knew where Bryan had gone. “My brother is a hateful man, B, I don’t want you over there, you hear me? I’m tired of him putting ideas and lies into your head.” Bryan’s dad took off his glasses and put down his book. His grey mustache was catching a flicker in the lamp. Bryan often thought the moustache of Satan probably looked somewhat like his fathers. Bryan breathed in. “He’s more of a father than you ever will be, Dad.” he stared at his father full of hatred and anger; stared right at his broken father. “B, you do not know what you are talking about,” he rose up out of his chair and walked towards Bryan. “Stop, don’t you come near me, don’t you DARE come near me!” He was yelling now and he didn’t even know why. Why was this anger surfacing, why now? “You drove her away, Dad, she left,” he screamed. “You told her to leave, and she LEFT. Why? Why did you stop loving her? Why was she so miserable with you that you both felt you couldn’t fix things? What did you do, God damnit!?” He was on fire now, in his father’s face, with tears in his eyes, my God, he had never acted this way, he had never yelled this way. Never had he shown his father that he hated him so. “Bryan you don’t know, you really don’t know…” His dad was crying now, a lump in his throat and he reached his arm out to take a hold of Bryan. “No!” Bryan raged. “WHY? TELL ME WHY!” His father was stammering. He sank back down, back into his chair. He looked up at Bryan. His voice shaking, still formed the words to tell him, finally, so that he might understand. “She was sleeping with Jason. For months, she’d been having an affair with him…” his true words trailed off into Bryan’s spinning world. So Bryan wrote another poem. Another poem to show the world what he believes about it. One last poem, symbolic of what we all discover once we leave our innocence and search for something deeper within reality. But sometimes, we never do find what we are looking for. Once on a yellow piece of paper with blue lines she wrote a poem And she called it “Charlie” because that was the name of her puppy and that’s what it was all about And her teacher gave her an A and a pat on the back And her mother hung it on the kitchen fridge and read it to all her friends That was the year Father Bill took all the kids to the musical and he let them sing on the bus And her little brother was born with tiny toenails and blue eyes And her mother and father kissed a lot And the boy around the corner sent her a card with X’s and O’s and she had to ask her mother what the X’s meant And her father always tucked her in bed at night And was always there to do it. Once on a piece of white paper without lines she wrote a poem And she called it “December” because that was the name of the month And that’s what it was all about And her teacher gave her an A and asked her to write more structured And her mother never hung it on the fridge because of the new paint And the kids told her That Father Bill smoked a pipe And left ashes in the pews and sometimes they left burns That was the year her brother got braces and glasses with black rims And the girl around the corner laughed When he asked her to go see a movie And the kids told her why Her father and mother kissed a lot And her father never tucked her in bed at night And her father got mad when she cried for him to do it. Once on a piece of paper torn from her notebook She wrote a poem And she called it “Innocence” because that was the question about her boy and that’s what it was all about And her professor gave her an A and a wondering uncertain expression And her mother never hung it on the kitchen fridge because she never showed her That was the year Father Bill died and she forgot all the words of the Nicene Creed And she caught her brother making out in his truck And her mother and father never kissed or even talked And the boy across the street was aggressive when she kissed him but she kissed him anyway because that was the thing to do And at 3 a.m. she tucked herself into bed her father snoring loudly That’s why on the back of her closet door she tried carving a poem And she called it “Empty & Meaningless” Because that’s what it was really all about And she gave herself an A and a slash on each damned wrist And she hung it on the bathroom door because this time she didn’t think she could reach the kitchen.

PLEASE FORGET

2008-10-12T19:04:00.000-07:00

He comes and sits on the bench next to me.

And I could feel, feel it in my heart that something was wrong.

It was happening again.

Because you know, sometimes I see a little wrinkle take shape in his brow

and a shadow cross his eyes as they grow sullen and distant.

And I wonder if he is seeing her.

Her strawberry blonde bangs sweeping her forehead

and her smile leaking a laugh that could soften stone hearts.

So refined, so golden and steady she is.

So beautiful and wise.

So unlike what he's stuck himself with now.

He blinks, hard, and I see him shake the longing as an opportunity missed.

He turns his head back to me, and forces a grin of mediocre satisfaction,

he moves his hand over to mine, and places our palms together,

then our fingers sink to interlock to one, as well.

And he squeezes.

And my heart breaks, because I know.

His painful attempt to reassure me,

I'm not her.

But I'll do.

I smile back, and lean my head on his shoulder.

We turn and watch the…

Well, nothing really.

There were a few trees in the park,

There were a few kids running around.

There were a few bugs around our feet.

And there were some clouds holding rain up above.

I thought about the clouds.

I wanted them to break open.

I wanted them to pour out the water.

Dump it, all of it, right on top of us.

Because that’s how I felt.

Because that’s how it’s supposed to feel.

Broken, and poured out.

Emptied.

Words don’t exist sometimes for what hearts want to say.

But that’s how it goes.

Because that’s how it is supposed to go.

We exchange a few words.

A few facts about our day.

I’m quiet, and I wonder if he knows that I know.

He touches my arm again and electricity happens.

I wish it wouldn’t.

He says lies again.

I wish he wouldn’t.

I avoid his eyes.

I can read right through them.

I can’t do this.

I breathe in hard and deep,

I kiss him quickly on the cheek and I turn and get up.

I say goodbye.

I walk away, leaving him there, on the bench.

Leaving him right there.

The kind of exit that happens in movies.

And a tear swelled then, and fell on my cheek.

But I didn’t do it, friend.

I did not look back.

He always belonged to her first.

ORANGE PEEL

2008-10-05T21:19:00.000-07:00

SO, Oklahoma State had it's annual Orange Peel concert Friday night. I totally had boughten my $40 ticket to go see Ashton Shepherd, Motion City Soundtrack, Kellie Pickler, and Sugarland, but I decided to go wakeboard that Friday afternoon for a few hours before I came home to shower and get ready. But my plans were interrupted when our brilliant boat driver drove over the ski rope and got it wrapped in the prop. So he thought that it might be a good idea to then REVERSE back over the rope, tangling it now the opposite direction as well. So we got stuck out on the lake for a good extra hour, the boys all diving and taking turns swimming under the boat to try to untangle this mess. My job as the only girl was to hold the dog. Hold the dog. Which I couldn't even do cause it was a really big dog who liked to jump in the water every time a guy did. So I didnt make it back in time for the really awesome concert I was excited about. But i heard it was really great :-) Orange Peel has been around OSU for quite some time now and always attracts a pretty large crowd. The concert is one of OSU's favorite traditions. I have been at this university for two years now and have yet to experience it. Last year it was canceled and this year...well, I just told you. Maybe next year I'l make it!